Personnel File Update

FROM: General Skoda

TO: Detach Detachment, Zeta Sector

It has been brought to my attention by some very pesky analysts that due to the nature of your very prestigious assignment in an uncharted area of the galaxy, that it is both inefficient and inexpedient to demand personnel files at this time.

Those big words mean nobody wants to do the updating in two weeks when the etherspace comm you louts send in from the edge of known space finally gets in- and then do it again if you return.

So, all Detachment members may therefore send in their personnel files at personal discretion until the very moment your transport drops out of hyperspace and back into the REAL part of the galaxy.

The first thing I expect your transport to do upon return is send the entire personnel file list via etherspace comm. Relay verification codes to the nearest comm satellite station to ensure you have done this in a timely manner or I will make certain your next assignment involves guarding slag.

I remind you, that as you plush bastards have been gleaning quite a bit of side income from the shocking amount of press you have received over the past few years, it would behoove your bottom lines, in every sense, to put these files up. However, due to the nature of the goddamn space time continuum, I am unable to order you to do so at present.

Try not to start an intergalactic war in the Gelack sector.

Secretary: Should I edit this, sir?

General: Of course not. They’re big guns. They can handle a little gruff. Send it off right now.

Brigadier General Emilies Vega Skoda, GAF HQ